The mad dash to monitoring

People seem to think that when you work in education, you have SO much free time.  I honestly can't think of a worse profession for trying to schedule appointments.  True, I could make an appointment at 4pm without having to miss any work, but there is zero flexibility during the day, and to take a whole day off is a REALLY big deal and impacts your colleagues.  Apparently, there is even a note in my chart that says, "Teacher - minimize monitoring as much as possible."

The thing is that the IVF clinic really thinks they have a solution - they have appointments for bloodwork and ultrasound that start at 6:30 in the morning!  Ummm I'm at work by 6:30...so this does not help me out at all, in fact it is a cause for significant anxiety.

I've started, what I believe may be, my dream job this year.  It's new, exciting, challenging, and I'm definitely still learning the ropes and making mistakes, so I absolutely do NOT want to come across as someone who is slacking off or not meeting my responsibilities.  I hate missing work. Ever.

I made the decision to tell my boss earlier in the year what was going on, why I would need to come in late 1-3 times per month and possibly take 1/2 days without much notice due to the importance of timing and domino effect of each step.  She has been really understanding and supportive, but it is less than ideal, and if I didn't know my boss as well as I did before I even started working here...I can't imagine how hard it would be to make the decision to reveal your infertility struggles at work or cover it up/be secretive about all the time you need to be flexible/miss work responsibilities.  I am so grateful I can trust her and count on her support.

So back to 6:30am...I've figured out some tricks to be the absolute first person on the sign in sheet.

1. Leave my house at 6:10 to get there around 6:20 even with traffic (I'm so lucky our IVF clinic is 3 miles from my house and near the highway to get to work.)
2. Park as close as possible to the door - I haven't quite figured out if the # of spaces you are from the door is an unofficial order - today I chose to totally ignore that - I got out of my car first and was at the door.
3. Exactly at 6:30 the tiny light on the security pad at the door turns green (another woman showed me this today).
4. Walk purposefully to the sign in desk and try not to throw elbows.

Generally, they do blood first - which is good AND bad.  If you're the first on the list and you do blood first and WHILE you're in there they call the first ultrasound patient...that sucks.  There is only one ultrasound tech, and that process takes about 8-15 minutes per patient, whereas blood is under 5.  Today was my lucky day!  First for blood and was back in the waiting room by the time the ultrasound tech came out.  I was at work signing in before homeroom ended, though I had had to arrange coverage for my breakfast duty.

Having done this for 3 cycles now, I am definitely finding my favorite phlebotomists and ultrasound techs.

For the blood-takers it's all about who is the least painful and fastest - so far I love all of the phlebotomists at my clinic.  In all the testing and monitoring, I only ever had one not perfect stick, so I really cannot complain.

For u/s techs...while they have all been pleasant, I dread getting the silent one.  I had her today.  The other two have given me the follicle counts/measurements and lining thickness they observed, which makes my day MUCH better. Sure I still get the call from the nurse in the afternoon, and she gives more info as to what the numbers mean and the next steps, but at least I get a tiny reward of information for having messed up my work schedule.  The silent one says nothing...which I'm sure is what she's SUPPOSED to do...but you just violated me with a u/s wand for 5 minutes and I hear clicks and beeps and typing...so I know you see something...but no reward!  Fingers crossed that there are some good follicles.  So far each of my previous two monitored cycles, I have had 1-3 follicles that have matured.

Abbreviations Abound

While I admit that I haven't been using the message boards very much at all during our quest,  I find it pretty ridiculous all of the abbreviations that are used when it comes to talking about trying to have a baby and infertility...it makes it so intimidating if you are looking for answers - you have to learn a whole new language first!  I am going to make every effort possible to NOT use the abbreviations such as...

Here is part of the helpful list I found on infertileground.com.  I mean REALLY...(and I took out ones that seemed totally irrelevant at the moment)

A
Acu acupuncture
AF “Aunt Flo” / menstrual cycle
AFC antral follicle count
AH assisted hatching
AI artificial insemination
AMA advanced maternal age, American Medical Association
AO anovulation, anovulatory
ART assisted reproductive technology
ASA antisperm antibodies

B
BBT basal body temperature
BBs breasts - what if yours are AA's? or CC's? :)
BCP birth control pills
BD baby dance (get it?) - This one cracked me up - I mean...come on...
BFN big fat negative (pregnancy test) Sigh...this one seems very accurate in its tone.
BFP big fat positive (pregnancy test)
Blast blastocyst
BMI body mass indexB/W bloodwork

C
CBE Clear-Blue Easy (hpt brand) LOVE it - even in the abbreviation list, they use abbreviations...
CD cycle day
CM cervical mucus
CP cervical position

D
D&C dilation & curettage
DC dear child
DD dear daughter
DE donor egg
Dembie donor embryo
DH dear husband
DI donor insemination
DOR diminished ovarian reserve
DP dear partner
DPO days past ovulation
DPT days past transfer
DS donor sperm, dear son
DTD do (or did) the deed (get that one too?) Not much better than Baby Dance...
Dx diagnosis

E
E2 estradiol
EDD estimated due date
Embie embryo
EPO evening primrose oil
EPT Early Pregnancy Test (hpt brand)
ER egg retrieval
ET embryo transfer
EWCM eggwhite cervical mucus

F
FB Fertility Blend (proprietary vitamin-herbal blend)
FET frozen embryo transfer
FM fertility monitor
FMU first morning urine
FP follicular phase
FRER First Response Early Results (hpt)
FSH follicle stimulating hormone

G
GIFT gamete intrafallopian transfer
GnRH gonadotropin releasing hormone

H
HCG human chorionic gonadotropin
HPT home pregnancy test
HSG hysterosalpingogram
Hx history

I
IC Internet cheapie (generic home pregnancy test)
ICSI intracytoplasmic sperm injection
IF infertility
IM intramuscular
IUI intrauterine insemination
IVF in vitro fertilization
IVIg intravenous immunoglobulin

L
Lap laparoscopy
LH luteinizing hormone
LMP last menstrual period (start date)
LP luteal phase
LPD luteal phase defect

M
MF male factor
MFI male factor infertility
Morph morphology (sperm shape)

N
NP nurse practitioner, naturopath

O
O ovulation
OB/GYN obstetrician/gynecologist
OPK ovulation predictor kit
OR ovarian reserve, operating room
OTC over the counter
OHSS ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome

P
PCOS polycystic ovary syndrome
PCP primary care physician
PCT post-coital test
PG Pregnant
PGD preimplantation genetic diagnosis
PID pelvic inflammatory disease
PIO progesterone in oil (injection)
PMS premenstrual syndrome
PNV prenatal vitamin
POAS pee on a stick (the stick = an hpt)
POF premature ovarian failure
Preemie baby born prematurely
PUPO Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise

R
RE reproductive endocrinologist

S
SA semen analysis
SHG sonohysterogram
SMEP sperm meets egg plan  I actually think this one is kind of cute.
SO significant other
SQ subcutaneous
Stims ovulation stimulation drugs

T
TCM traditional Chinese medicine
TCOYF Taking Charge of Your Fertility (popular book)
TL tubal ligation
TR tubal reversal / tubal ligation reversal
TTC trying to conceive Guilty - I know I've used this one...

TWW, 2ww two-week wait (between O and time to test for pregnancy) Possibly the worst part of the whole shebang.
Tx treatment

U
U/S Ultrasound

So let's say you are looking for an answer on one of these message boards...it took me 15 minutes just to decipher what the respondents were trying to say/what the question was talking about - and then you have to throw in a handful of salt, as little of it has been proofread by medical professionals. 

So, I just wanted to say that I will be trying my best to make my blog readable by everyone - even if you haven't learned the secret language of infertility yet :) (Though now you've had a mini crash course!)

Clomid tears

So last night, we were finally watching the Top Chef finale, and as soon as the live competition started, I teared up!  Now, my husband is used to my propensity for shedding a tear during "sports moments," (overtime goals, amazing shots, last minute wins), but this was absolutely ridiculous.  I mean, top chef tears?  That is a new one.

Fast forward to this morning, and I was sitting on the couch, eating my cereal, thinking about the long list of things I had to do today for work and the house...more tears.  And the crazy part is, I'm not even a cryer - I don't usually cry about much at all, about anything.  I hate the way Clomid makes me feel.

As my mom said on the phone today, I sound blue.  I think blue is color those little devil pills should be...to warn you about how you will feel on them.  At least last night was the last one for this cycle - and most likely, ever, as I do not think it's worth it to go above and beyond the 3 medicated IUI cycles that the insurance requires before IVF, when it's not helping our chances much and makes me feel this miserable. Hopefully the next week will go quickly, as the side-effects seem to last until ovulation, and hopefully I don't have any "meeting tears" the next few days when I'm in charge...